TG
Team Gaki Presents
Team Leader
Rich
Translators
Karapeev819
GakiNoSuitGuy
Lei the Level 2 Mage
Mickstar
Shizentaisuu
Aluminumlemon
Winter
EcksDee
WorldWideWojnar
Solarwings
Maatan
Typesetters
Inugami
JustStevenThings
Amria
Sevendayheaven
YajuShinki
hachiagejo
Sacro
sythy
veliem
Hinnerk
English Checker
James
Quality Checker
PeaceBrigade
Abyss of Surpressed Emotion
An abyss of surpressed emotions...
That's when people cry and break into laughter
Crying while breaking into laughter
That's when people cry and break into laughter
Gaki No Tsukai's Best Series!!
"No Laughing Scientists"
Gaki No Tsukai's best
"No Laughing" series!
This year they are scientists!
YAAAAA!!!
Laughter Assassins Attack
Most Powerful Lineup!!
The strongest lineup of laughter assassins!
I have no idea
Don't say it like that!!
Anything can happen if it's funny!
Barrage of solid jokes!!
If it's funny, anything can happen!
The laughter assassins barrage them with solid jokes!!
YOU'RE NOT GONNA COME?
Shoten
Shoten's Urgent Showdown!!
URGENT SHOWDOWN
Shoten's Urgent Showdown!!
What do they have in common?
SECRET is important
Of course I'd laugh at that!!
Experiments
Skill
Science experiments laced with skill!
Rocket Punch Explosion
That's so dirty!!
Unpleasant Memories
Unpleasant memories...
Run away from the devils!
Screaming and screeching tag!!
They must run from the devils again this year!
scale up
Storm of screams
The punishments are scaled up to a storm of screams!
WHAT THE HELL IS THIS!?
That's the worst!!
Unbelievable Behavior
Abdominal Collapse! Waking up experiment!
Abdominal collapse! Waking up experiment!!
This year's Jimmy is amazing!!
I can't! Sorry!!
It's a monster!!
YOU DID IT!
AHHH DON'T!!
YOU DID IT!!
AAAAAHHHH~!!
Continuous laughter!! Don't miss the 6-hour special!!
Continuous laughter! Prepared 6-hour special!!
Continuous laughter!! Don't miss the 6 hour special!!
The New Year's Special,
absolutely no laughing
No Laughing
24 Hours
24-Hour Scientists!!
SCIENTISTS
Downtown
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Hamada Masatoshi
Here we are again.
Cocorico
Endo Shozo
Tanaka Naoki
Tsukitei Housei
Please enjoy!!
Here we are, once again!!
We hope you like it!
I'm tired of the cheering!!
That was a very cool line just now
Your voice is gone!!
Ah, Hamada-san!!
Go home, Hamada-san!
Your voice has no strength
I'm fine
What?
I'm fine
You are not okay!
No you aren't!
You're not okay like that?
Your voice is rattling
Your voice is like Umemiya Tatsuo's voice
You're gonna get scolded
This year's theme is..?
Yes, this year's theme is...
It was scientists
Yes, it was scientists.
It's a long stretch, so
Matsumoto-san, introduce the VTR please
The previous previous VTR has
been edited for everyone in the studio
The previous previous VTR has
to include what we call subs, START!!
THAT'S ENOUGH
He introduced it very politely
START!!
"Polite" in some sense
No Laughing Scientists
Starting Point
The starting point,
on a morning like any other,
Ordinary Morning
kindly welcomes the 5 men
The weather is just like the past years
It's always the same
It doesn't cheer us up...
I really don't think we need 5 people
Isn't 4 people enough?
You mean we switch in and out?
Anyone, don't you think 4 people is enough?
So that one persontakes a break?
So that one person takes a break?
Yes, they take a break
That in itself sounds hard
Do you have a problem with that?
The one who's resting will be worried sick
No, I wouldn't be worried at all. I just want to rest.
No no no, what are you saying?
Right?
It's "Downtown's Gaki no Tsukai ya Arahende"
Yes, that's right
I've never been told
Our pay is divided among 5 people anyway
YEAH RIGHT
That's not true
Right, Hosei-san?
That's not true
Wait here
"Wait here" it says
It's cooollddd
Delorean
Whoa, incredible
Amazing
Did he borrow that from Kon-chan?
Wow wow wow
Incredible
Hahaha
Wow, amazing
And the person inside is?
Of course
Everyone, good morning!
Forget good morning...
Downtown's Former Manager
Fujiwara Hiroshi
He looks like a monster
What a dirty face
Come back later, lose some weight, then come back
Seriously
Yeah
I just came back from the future but
Yoshimoto Kogyo had, in the Manhattan Metropolis,
Yoshimoto Kogyo had, in the Manhattan Metropolis
built a 300-story company building
I was so surprised!!
Who are you?
Uh... a scientist
Aaahhh no no no
Not a scientist...
What happened?
"Ah no no"
Natural comedian!!
So uh, guys
By looking at this outfit, I'm sure you can tell
Oh, he's going to tell us here
This year's theme is Professors of Science
What?
This year's theme is Professors of Science
Oh, professors of science
There's a word like that?
No there isn't, if you think about it
Science and Professor are words, but
"Professor of Science" doesn't seem to be a phrase
You're Professors of Science!!
Matsumoto!!
Professors of Science or Yoshimoto, which do you like more?
Professors of Science
Even though you say that, I already know
You REALLY like Yoshimoto
"Even though you say that"!?
These 5 become rookie scientists &
endure 24 hours of rigorous duty
With that,
the 5 men become rookie scientists
Why did they use that picture for Hosei?
and endure 24 hours of rigorous duty
I know right?!
How spiteful
Moreover, you guys
call yourselves scientists but what the hell are you wearing?
Well you just told us, so...
Yeah
Your change of clothes are in those BOXES
Can you go change immediately?
Isn't there a more scientific way to change?
Yeah!
change into appropriate clothing
Before fulfilling scientists' duties
The first step to becoming scientists,
they must change into the appropriate clothing
It's just a box and a curtain
I'm going to get you all to come out one after another
First up, Matsumoto
You look good
Muscular Macho Doctor
Thank you very much
You're setting the bar high
Thank you!
You look like you could have an IQ of 200
Ahh, I might
Okay next, Endo!
Wish me luck!
Handsome as always you look good
Handsome Newlywed Doctor
Handsome as always you look good
He is newly-married, right?
You look like you could win a Nobel Prize
I'll do my best!
Tanaka!
Oh, you look good
Lanky Dirty Doctor
You're looking a little lanky
but you look smart
Thank you very much
You're like the Edison of the Comedy World
"Lanky"
I appreciate it
So
Hosei!
Looking good
Naive Little Boy Doctor
Thank you
You look cute
"Naive little boy"
You look like you're squid-witted
Squid?
Quick-witted
Seafood?
You mean seafood?
Quick-witted
Okay, Hamada!
Hamada is the only Female Scientist
Look at that
Female scientist!
Why are youthe only female scientist?
Is that what they meant?
Why are you the only female scientist?
What happened to you?
Female scientist!
No no I don't like it
Wait she's pregnant
He has to take caution
What a mess
She's pregnant!!
She has huge boobs
Pregnant...
Your pants: what are those pink frills?
What is that?
Sexy... garter
Sexy garter, is it?
Is it a sexy garter?
This shows up every few years, this sexy garter...
Yes, it pops up
Speaking of which "there it is", that wig...
Right?
No doubt about it
No doubt...
Apparently that's not a wig
Apparently that's his spirit
It forms via his spirit
It appears if he bites his thumb or something
Does it grow out?
This year's rules are simple
Train as rookie scientists for 24 hours
During training, absolutely no laughing
If you laugh, you'll receive a harsh punishment
For 24 hours, during their training, they cannot laugh, no matter what
That's all there is to the rules
So, uh, the
"Science Laboratory" bus will be here
Again?
Let's go then
No more buses, let's just walk
We're scientists but we still travel by bus
I'm fine with the bus; I just want to get there quickly.
I agree
I know that's not the case, though
Starting point
Finally, they are facing the harsh beginning
The relaxed mood has changed
Tensions are high
The tensions are high
It's cold-
oh, it's here!!
In that moment the 5 men saw
the bus that would transport them
This bus was
leaked all over Twitter and the like
It was everywhere
It was all over the place
Guys the bus is here
Of course
I can see it...
I know
Guys, look
Gaasuu Kurobikari Science Laboratory:
that's the place where you guys will spend your time researching
How is it? Funny, right?
What? Funny?
It's not quite funny...
Not funny
Were you aiming to be funny?
Then it's not particularly funny
It's pretty average
Then it's not particularly funny
The bus to Gaasuu Kurobikari Science Laboratory
On the bus designed with Ein-suga-ein's face
They will set off to the Science Laboratory
they will make their way to the Science Laboratory
Everyone,
once you board the bus,
you’re not allowed to laugh
Everyone
When you feel you’re ready, then we’ll head off
Let’s board from the middle entrance
From the middle?
we’re going in this order?
It’ll start once we board
Aw man, then
Let's go
Shall we board?
Yep
It begins
Man, I don’t wanna start but I guess it won't end if we don’t start
Ahhh
Man, I don’t wanna start, but I guess it won't end if we don’t start
That's right
It's gonna be hell
Okayy, I’m gonna board
Let's go shall we?
Do not laugh Scientists 24 hours
Okay I'm on
Only Tanaka isn't allowed to laugh
We haven't started yet, have we?
Say something, man
What are you doing?
How come you’re not getting on the bus?
Oh that's how you board the bus so I thought
Please get on the bus
You gotta be kidding me
It just popped out of nowhere
No wayyy
Aw come on guys
The timing was awesome
Tanaka's out right?
He's out
We didn’t get on
Come on guys...
What the hell is this?!
Why aren’t you guys boarding the bus?
Wow
An ass whipping from
the Black Army soldiers
I feel sorry for Tanaka
That was crazy
That was bad, man
That was awesome
Alright let's go
Okay, okay let's get on
let’s get on
let’s get on, please
That was quite a hit
Okay let's do this
All aboard
That was awesome
Let's do this
Do we have to sit in order?
T/N: Matsumoto is using a foreigner accent
That messed me up real bad
Passengers already on board
Man...
We’re aiming for cheap laughs with that fart, aren't we?
We're aiming for cheap laughs with that fart, aren't we?
Hahaha
But it was freaking hilarious
Is that so?
You just casually laughed
You just laughed
Yeah we’re aiming for cheap laughs
Yeah just now
That's right. I totally forgot not to laugh
You're still laughing now
You just laughed
You're still laughing now
You just casually laughed
Really?
Let's get serious
As they set off to the Science Laboratory
As they set off,
what lies ahead for them?
Ahh so it begins
The year 2016
From now on they wont be able to laugh
Within the bus, the atmosphere gets heavy
Laughing assassins lie ahead;
who will be the first special guest!?
For them, laughing assassins lie ahead
with the first being a special guest, who will it be?
Laughing assassins lie ahead;
who will be the first special guest!?
For them, laughing assassins lie ahead, with the first being a special guest,
who will it be?
So what’s your name?
So it's like that hey
Arrived at a bus stop
The platform's pretty low
That was quick
Ah this part
Detective
Wakabayashi Masayasu
Inspector Zenigata
T/N: Suzuki is playing Inspector Zenigata from a popular manga series called Lupin the Third
Suzuki Ryohei
This should be the bus
It follows the escapades of master thief Arsène Lupin III and Lupin and his gang are constantly chased by Inspector Koichi Zenigata of the ICPO, who has made it his life's work to arrest them, pursuing Lupin across the globe.
Yes, I received information that Lupin is on this bus
It's Suzuki Suzuki
It's Suzuki, Suzuki
Oi you guys!
Until i find Lupin here, I can't allow you to leave
Inspector Zenigata’s mission
Arresting Lupin the fugitive
You will show yourself to us willingly
Zenigata...?
Inspector,
these 5 guys dressed as scientists, don’t they look suspicious?
Certainly...
It's a gut feeling we have
Lupin is certainly here
Well done, inspector
Which one of these people might be Lupin?
Speaking of Lupin, he is a master of disguise, so it wont be easy to find him
Before we arrest someone, bring those guys in here!
Before we arrest someone, bring those guys in here
Alright, come in!!
What is it?
Lupin’s accomplices
Endo’s father and brother board the bus
What is it?
Already here
Already here, all of a sudden
That was quick
Again, this year
That was quick
Endo's family is here again
Come on
Already
Hey Goemon
T/N: Endo's dad is playing Goemon. Another character from the Lupin the Third manga franchise, Goemon Ishikawa XIII is a renegade samurai that usually partners with Lupin in his exploits
Out of these 5 people, point out Lupin
I have no frickin clue
He doesn't talk like that...
He hasn't done his research
He doesn't talk like that
You should do your research
What was that?
Who do you think you're playing?
Looks like he's just winging it
No clue...
He's just winging it
Inspector, looks like this guy is keeping his mouth shut
Seems so..
You know what,
I just wanted to do a plug-in (advertise) of my new TV drama
Why do I have be alongside this B-grade celebrity’s family?
At the end of the year why am I stuck in a show with comedians and
doing this serious skit with these idiots?
You don’t have to be that straight up about it!
I feel sorry for him
He's right though
You didn't need to say that directly
He's right
He exposed everything!
He’s so straight forward!
He hit my back
He’s so straight forward!
He was so straight up about it
You shouldn’t really say that, that was dirty!
But you know, what Lupin is a pro at disguising
however his weak point is a honey-trap
Bring the recently arrested Fujiko in here
Hey, Fujiko you're up!!
That means...
So that means it's
Yep
Heyy~ its me Fujiko
Lupin’s accomplice
Endo’s mum boards the bus
"Heyy~ its me Fujiko"
"Heyy~ its me Fujiko"?
T/N: Endo's mum is playing Lupin's love interest, Fujiko Mine. Although Fujiko usually works together with the others, she occasionally exploits Lupin's interest in her to steal the treasure for herself.
"Heyy~ its me Fujiko"
This is bad
There she is
Wow
She has no clue
The real Fujiko doesn't say
"Heyy~ its me Fujiko" she doesn't say that
Welcome Fujiko, Your se-
I’m wondering if-
Huh? what is it?
if we (his parents) can find Lupin
using this sexy outfit to lure him out
she just wants to deliver her lines
This is awesome
Oh my God
What is with her delivery?
Her delivery
The delivery of her lines is so stiff
Aw man this is bad
The delivery of her lines is so stiff
Let's see what she gonna say next
Out of these five,
Fujiko’s mission
Luring out Lupin using a honey-trap
in order, I will find Lupin
using my sexiness to lure him out
Come again?
Yes, you!
What do you think of this?
This is tough
Not really
Don’t you think I'm sexy?
Yeah...
Ah yes?
You look good for your age
Oh my goodness...
You're so cute~
What the hell is this?
Bam!!
What the hell indeed...
I have no idea what's going on...
That's right
What's going on..?
Ahh so this is how the new year starts
I have no idea...
This will never ever end
Oy you are not doing a very good job!!
They're not gonna call us to come back next year!
I'm doing the best that I can
We won't be able to work together anymore
Fujiko VS Goemon
Inner conflict regarding mission details
I’m really doing my best
You should do it properly
Looks like it
I am!
You should try harder
You wanna fight?
It's been 40 years
40 years, wow...
Man this...
That was bad
That was a bad rip-off
Fujiko VS Goemon
A rehash of Ueshima and Degawa’s argument
They didn't do it very well
It's been 40 years...
Yes about 40 years
(Translator note: Endo's brother is playing Daisuke Jigen, Lupin's right-hand man and closest ally)
In front of my brother as well...
Hey Jigen
This fat lip lady is full giving you a dirty look
Do not engage with her at all costs!!
What are you staring at?
T/N: Endo’s brother is speaking politely with a bad attitude
I don't think I was...
Stop that, Jyunji
That's enough, Jigen
He’s speaking politely
I don't think...
What the hell are you staring at?
No I wasn't
Oy, big lipped freak
I wasn't staring...
Jigen VS Hamada
Another rehash of Ueshima and Degawa’s argument
I wasn't
You were staring
No, no I wasn't
You were
What are you staring at, huh?
I said I wasn't
Yes you were
What the hell
I'm sorry I didn't know
Man again this year
I know right
There's no escape
You just can't break away
Come on
There's just no escape
Once you're in that situation, there's no escape
You heard what he said: he called you a big lipped freak
That was close
He was being so polite as well
I dunno, what should we do now?
That’s right, we have no other choice
Alright! Bring out the woman they call the "number 1 sexiest woman" in our police department!
The last strategy to arrest Lupin
The Police Department’s Number 1 sexiest woman
Yes that woman
We should be able to find the fugitive with this honey-trap
Please come in!!
Ahh I think I know who it is
Who is it?
Huh!?
Your wife!!
I am Cocorico’s Endo’s wife, Masami
Please come in!!
Ahh I think I know who it is
Who is it?
Huh?!
Your wife!!
That's my wife
I am Cocorico’s Endo’s wife, Masami
No way!
The last strategy to arrest Lupin
Infiltration of Endo’s wife
Hold up!
Oh my God
Hold on a second!
Ah, nice to meet you!
Oh my God
Hold on a second!
Wow the whole family’s here!
That's right everyone's here
Isn’t she Sekine’s ex-manager?
Yes, yes that's right
Isn't she Sekine’s ex-manager?
T/N: Sekine Tsutomu is a widely known comedian and actor in Japan. When Endo dated Sekine's ex-manager a few years ago, it became a big scoop in the Entertainment business.
You gotta be kiddin' me
I can't believe it
Thank you miss, please have a seat.
You serious?
This was also referenced in 2011/2012 "No Laughing Airport" Batsu Game when Sekine confronted Endo, taunting his love for "women working backstage".
Thank you miss, please have a seat.
Nice to meet you
You shouldn’t be here!
You shouldn’t be here! Seriously!
Are you being serious right now?
They already laughed, but please continue to enjoy
Miss
Today is a good chance to vent your frustrations
Last strategy to arrest Lupin
Luring out Lupin by venting out her daily frustrations
Vent to your heart's content
What is with this scenario?
Sho-chan,why won't you buy me a wedding ring?
Sho-chan, why won't you buy me a wedding ring?
I want a wedding ceremony!
Isn't it strange?Married with no rings?
Isn't it strange? Married without rings?
We talked about buying one later, right?
We talked about buying, right?
I've been asking for a whole year now!
It hasn't been a year. These things take time, like having kids...
1 year? That’s not on.
Awful!
It shouldn't take you that long.
You keep saying you're not in the mood!
You know I've beenwaiting for a second child!
You know I've been waiting for a second child!
Don't say such things on New Year's Eve.
Yeah.Your Dad, Mom and brother: they're all here too.
Yeah. Your Dad, Mom and brother: they're all here too.
Yeah. Your Dad, Mom and brother:they're all here too.
Yeah. Your Dad, Mom and brother are all here.
I want a ring, and a wedding in Hawaii!
Hear me? I want it, I want it!
Promise me!
Promise me!!!
What the hell are you doing!?
What was that?
Yes...
And here, Endo Shozo got married again!
What was the "Yes" for?
So, everyone, let's all sing together!
Ladybug Samba
This is ridiculous.
Absolutely! What was that all about?
Shozo and Masami in Wonderland,
got married in a Gaki no Tsukai bus sketch.
Embarrassed, Shozo got a gentle smile.
Now I have you all to myself.
However, my husband's habits remain.
A cheating husband wanders away...
Now he seduces the receptionist.
The lyrics are ridiculous too
What are these lyrics?
Really!
To his beloved Masami, Shozo said...
...if comedians don't cheat, they won't shine!
He has no taste in women, our pervert Shozo
I've never said such a thing!
The old man can't remember any of the lyrics
...gets rejected by the receptionist.
Memorize, old man, memorize!
Even the producer starts to get worried
What do they want from me?
But I still love my husband,
cheerful, I've become a celebrity's bride!
Shozo-san,
Masami-san,
congratulations!
Congratulations! Congratulations! Congratulations!
Thank you!
So, shall we go?
Goodbye!
Hamada laughed a lot here.
What was that about?
It's finally over.
No kidding.
They even brought my wife...
About the Ladybug song...
your Dad couldn't remember a word.
Endo shocked by his wife!! The laughter assassins won’t let them rest!
While shocked be the appearance of Endo's wife,
the laughter-punishments continue without rest!
We should be close now.
Yes, just a bit further.
I don't see any buildings yet.
That's a residence area...
PITSTOP
Do we get off?
No, not yet.
We're not getting off then.
high school student
Gekidan Hitori
Kawashima,
why do you skip classes?
Seems he isn’t able to go to school
I won’t know if you don’t tell me!
Sensei...
I'm...worried about the entrance exams!
I'm worried about the entrance exams!
Worried about... the entrance exams?
Well, I’m the only one right?
Who probably won’t get into his choice of uni?
And my classmates will probably
make fun of me.
Kawashima,
Everyone feels pressured by the exams.
You’re all in the same boat
And everyone in the class
wants to work hard together with you!
Everyone?
That's right!
Sensei, now I understand...
Slapped by short-tempered teacher
Everyone's waiting for you!
Everyone?
You’re going to slap him there?
Sensei,
Everyone is waiti...
Are you going to betray them?!
I see... of course... I...
I see, of course... I...
??? (0_o) ???
What have I been doing until now?
Sensei, I...
You're supposed to be a man!
When one is in trouble,
The person who extends their hands to you is your friends!
That's true.
Kawashima,
Come here!
No...
Comepart 2
Come here!
Kawashima!
Watch out!
That hurts!
He bumped his head!
Right here
Is he gonna be OK?
Kawashimaa!
They're still going.
Kawashima!
That's harsh...
Kawashima!
He's still shouting at him.
Let's go already, they got off.
This is getting on my nerves.
Kawashimaaa!
Enough already, he said he would go to school.
"Go to school" he saidpart 2
"Go to school" he said, of course he'll get mad.
They're still going!
Kawashimaa!
Let's go to school!!
One hour since the start
Roughly one hour into the show
Due to the endless punishments, the five’s tension dips…
Laughter assassins wait just around the corner.
More punishments await them just round the corner.
Laughter punishers just round the corner
PITSTOP
What now?
Itao Itsuji (Yoshimoto Creative Agency)
That's him, isn't it?
Yeah.
That's,probably *him*.
That's, probably *him*.
Cough
Ahhh...
In poor condition
thermometer
This is a continuation from last year, right?
You’re laughing!
The awkward silence, right?
temperature measured
The silence is quite scary too, right?
No fever!!
Keep that kind of thing to yourself
Hey, what are you looking at?
What the hell do you want?
high school student fight
(???)
Are you one of them?
Don't fight, you two!
Itao-senpai
What?
This is the legendary gang leader who took over this neighbourhood all by himself.
Are you Itao?!
Damn, that was scary
Itao's mother
Matsuko Inugami
What is with that language?!
This child is Itao.
And what about you rookie scientists over there?
What is with those looks on your faces?!
Do you think this child is not Itao?
Tanaka
Are you...
...feeling feverish?
I don't have a fever.
Let's just go to the lab already.
Tanaka, you measure your temperature too
I don't think I have a fever...
We can't proceed if you don't do it
No fever, right?
Reluctantly measuring his temperature
I don't think I have a fever though...
Passing time with a magazine
Show me
T/N: 37 degrees Celsius is 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit
Your temperature's 37 degrees
Slight fever!!
It differs from person to person...
That's right
Why are you 37 degrees, Tanaka?
You really do have a slight fever
Oh I see
Hand me that container
To be fair, he's right
It'd be troublesome if that was lost
You can't reset it
I've had enough!
It was a continuation from last year
T/N: Refer to last year's Itao skit
Yeah
It made me laugh
Bridging the years
Only a bit left for the bus journey
Drawing near to the Science Laboratory
There is only a bit left of the long bus journey. They draw near to the Science Laboratory.
Only a bit left for the bus journey
Drawing near to the Science Laboratory
There is only a bit left of the long bus journey. They draw near to the Science Laboratory.
Everyone, we're almost there
Yay
The bus carrying the five men draws closer to the Science Laboratory
Not the goal
However, this is not the goal, but a new battleground.
New battleground
We're here
Finally here
Ohhh we're here
We finally reached
The stage for "No laughing"
At this laboratory where new cells were found and laughter is life,
New cells found and research where laughter is life
the fierce battle with assassins of laughter begin
Arrived at the Science Laboratory
We've reached
Ah, we're here
Everyone, let's go
Okay
Science Laboratory...
Here
Isn't it a wonderful laboratory?
Scandalous cells discovered?
Medium-fatty tuna science...
Sounds like some amazing cells
Let's go
Laboratory grounds
Newest science laboratory. This is a school with quite a history.
It's said that surprising is the case
that funding for these type of places are not very good, for places like research labs.
Everyone
This is "that"
The founder of Gaasuu Kurobokari Science Laboratory
This is a statue of the founder Dr. Ein Suga-ein
Science Laboratory founder
Ein Suga-ein
Right
Can you please stand in a line here?
Alright, everyone?
He said ''alright''
Ein Su...
That first line...
Being outside is different from
when we were in the bus.
So
Dr. Ein Stein, when he was a child...
At that time, Dr. Ein Stein...
It's "Suga-ein"
Isn't it "Suga-ein"?
"Suga-ein" seemed to have been difficult for him
Is that so?
Right?
Fujiwara-san, please get it together
At that time, Dr. Ein Suga-ein...
Kawashimaa!!
Why do you not come to school!!
Whip of love by a passionate teacher
Whoa hahaha
Stop, he said he'd go, didn't he?
Oh man
Dangerous
It was bad
Dangerous
Aaargh!!!
Why?!
Stop
He said he's going so
Kawashima!
Why do you not come to school?
Everyone's waiting
Nothing we can do but still...
It's still continuing...
It's scary
Seems like they'll appear again
Seriously
I'll show you to the rookies' room now
The explanation for this is over?
Let's go
I didn't quite understand
The inside should be pretty clean
Science Laboratory Entrance
It's nice
Yeah
Over here
Science Laboratory 2nd floor
This place is huge
It's spacious
Everyone, over here
It's here
Rookie research room
This is
new...rookie scientists'...science
research room. Please wait here for the time being.
Aaargh
There are probably gags and stuff in the drawers again
9.30am in the morning. As expected,
Science Laboratory - 1 hour 30 minutes since the start
the curtain rises on that segment of gags
What about the drawers? Shall we do it?
Oh
Shall we do it?
Tanaka...
Shall I start?
The pattern of DVD for Tanaka
Yeah, it's probably in there
Thai kicks for 7 consecutive years via DVD
What's wrong?
Static electricity...
I don't get it
Yeah, DVDs every year...
Scary
Yeah, um...
Things like push?
Does it have?
No...
Uwahh, really?
This is not a DVD
This is a key
Scary
Mystery key with number 1 on it
A key
It has a "1" on it
How about the other drawers?
Open the rest?
Ah, nothing
Nothing.
Nothing. Just the key.
There's a locker with "1" on it. Shall we check it later?
Locker number 1
Or check it now?
There's really a "1" on it
Everyone, how about just opening your drawers?
There's a "1" on it
I'm doing it!!
The static's pretty strong
Yeah
Is that so?
No more static
There's something there
Uwah
T/N: a reference to an old prank variety show "Pioneer candid camera"「元祖どっきりカメラ」 which aired on NTV. It says "candid camera(pioneer)" on one side and "Prank success!" on the other side
The pioneer candid camera signboard
I don't really like this
It's a little scary
I have a bad feeling about this
Nothing
Ehh!!
There's something!
A set
Yeah
That's from that "Pioneer Candid Camera"
Pioneer candid camera set
It's a set!
Yes
Pioneer Candid Camera instruction manual
1. Put on the helmet and tighten the chin strap
Put on the helmet and tighten the chin strap
2. Wear the vest and button up
Wear the vest and button up
Hold up the placard with your right hand
3. Hold up the placard with your right hand
What's it for?
So we're doing this?
Tanaka, why don't you open that locker "1"?
Should I open it?
It's probably better for you to prepare
That's right
Ah..before I open
I don't know
Wear the vest
Yes, the vest too
This, should I wear this over my lab coat?
Something like that, you should think for yourself
That's right
Does it suit me?
What does he mean by "does it suit me?"?
What's with "does it suit me?"
Buckle the chin strap firmly
Well, I'll open the locker now then?
Wait
No, as you lift up that lever like this...
That's right
Seems like there's a box here
Seriously?
Really, what is it?
Mystery Box
Various things will come out
Seriously scary...
What is this?
I'll open it okay?
Wah
What is it? What is it?
Arrgghhh!!
What is it?
Scary!!
What is it?
Scary!!
Can you turn it to face us?
What is it? What do you mean by "scary"?
A mysterious mask
This is way too scary.
Are you supposed to put it on your head?
Wait, who?
Can you see through it?
There's something next to it.
What's that?
A neckwarmer?
Try putting it on.
Huh? Me?
Yeah you.
I mean you opened the box.
Yeah it's definitely yours.
Is this how you wear it?
Now put the mask on.
It's so you can't see his neck under the mask.
Ah, you're right.
It's supposed to look hyperreal.
This is way too scary.
Oh god, that's freaky.
This is terrifying.
Tanaka is really tall so it's even scarier.
That's true.
Why would anyone even need a mask like that?
Wait, stop striking that pose.
Don't pose like that when you have that on...
Come on Tanaka, stop it.
What the hell is with that pose!?
It really really doesn't fit the face.
Tanaka, stop.
No wait, it's not like that.
I just don't get the meaning here.
That's all?
Is that really it?
I told you to stop!
Tanaka, wearing that-
Take it off.
I'm telling you that's not it.
wearing that-
I really don't get it.
wearing that mask while posing is already too much.
Can I take it off for a second?
Probably really hot inside.
I don't really understand the point of this mask.
Why did Tanaka get it though?
You said it, Tanaka is tall so having him wear it would be hilarious.
aah- so embarrassing!
being pranked with a
whoopee cushion!
A fake producer arrives to set up the prank
the trap is set up and ready
This is what they mean by prank
A whoopee cushion..
So, at some point you need to take the sign and-
Miss Matsushita, this way please.
The target is Matsushita Yuki, an actress.
You really are useless...
We do apologise for the inconvenience...
Seriously, sort it out!
I will, I'm sorry.
Although they've all laughed, please enjoy the segment
One more thing, that outfit we agreed on earlier...
It's pretty damn ugly, isn't it?
Where the hell did you get that outfit anyway?
I will go deal with it immediately!
Oh and also, Listen to me properly next time!~
The target keeps avoiding the trap.
I said bring me a black coat, so why do you bring me a red coat?
Yes, I'm sorry.
Get your shit together, seriously!
Please, excuse me.
This is unbelievable...
FRRRRRRT
What the hell?
Replaying the scene in real life
No no, they edit that afterwards...
They edit it post-production!!
Huh? What's this?
The prank is a huge success!
Wha-?
It's this!
Don't tell me it's a prank...
It was you?
Yes!
Oh this is bad...
You did this?
Yeah, uh, I mean I didn't "do" it...
Yeah, uh I mean I didn't "do" it...
"I didn't do it"? So you're blaming someone else?
"I didn't do it?" So you're blaming someone else?
You're the one who did it right?!
You've got "prank" written there!
No! This is...
Oh this is really bad.
I'm
an actress, you know.
Yes.
Apologise to me.
No...
What you mean no? Apologise right now!
What are you waiting for? Apologise right now!
Apologise properly!
No, but I
Aahh! You're really pissing me off!
A Thai kick! Someone Thai kick this man!
Wait, wait a second please.
I don't understand!
Please wait a second!
Oh man, I'm safe!
Goodbye!
What's with this storyline?!
I don't get this, man
No way to run.
Yamazaki you shouldn't move.
This is too sudden!
AAGH IT HURTS, Oh GOD it hurts!
Augh-ow! Just- ouch!
This really is hell.
It's so much worse when there's no way out.
Wearing that hat is bad enough
Well, nothing you can do
Is the helmet hard to take off?
It won't come off.
Whoa, that's scary!
They locked the straps?
Man, this sucks.
It should have been Tanaka.
This year is different, it seems.
When you get kicked,
stop trying to appeal to us, okay?
So you really can't take it off?
That's yours now...
Wait a second, wait!
It's Son Goku
It's been 2 hours 30 minutes since they arrived at the lab.
There are still more traps waiting for them.
Alright, my turn!
Oh!!
No way~
Another DVD
Another one?
There might be even more.
It's a bit different from last year, isn't it?
You're right.
Nothing else, just this.
Another DVD
You have to watch it.
Nothing good can come from this, for sure
Nothing good can come from this at all, for sure
Yeah, you're right, no way in hell.
But we don't know if they're all the same.
Well, I don't think it's gonna be another Thai kick.
Here we go.
Aaagh what's this one gonna be?
50th anniversary surprise!
Shouten!
This is the real thing, isn't it?
He's gonna show up too, then?
What, what-what-what?
Amazing
Produced by Nippon TV
Shunpuutei Shouta
Ah, it's Obasan!
Hello, welcome to Shouten, I'm Shunpuutei Shouta
Right! Today's episode is a special, no-laughing quiz!
Korakuen hall, Tokyo
Doing a show without laughing is incredibly hard, but
we'll give it our best shot, so let's go!
Begin the no-laughing quiz show!
Shouten
The quiz begins
Is this really happening?
Amazing!
I can't believe it.
Ah, it's this show.
Thank you for waiting, let's start the show!
Now let's hear their greetings to the Gaki no Tsukai cast.
Sanyutei Koyuza
Right, I'm a massive fan of many Gaki no Tsukai episodes
like "Women's body I wanted to taste (kiki)," "Seven Sexy Outfits (Shichi-Henge)" and "Women's body I wanted to try (Absolutely Tasty)"
These are definitely my favourites!
I am Shouten's Fukuyama Masaharu, pleased to meet you.
Sanyutei Kouraku
I always get told off for not doing my jokes properly
But today, we are not allowed to laugh
So just like always
I will not do my joke properly.
Hey, Gaki members!
Hayashiya Kikuo
This 24-hour challenge sounds really tough
You need to conserve your energy!
I'll treat you all to some ramen later on.
Except for Tanaka, you don't need to eat it though, since you are so damn dirty.
Good luck!
Hayashiya Sanpei
Matsumoto? Do you still drink protein shakes every day?
Hosei, apparently your wife is beautiful.
Well, so is mine.
...Anyway, I'm appearing on Gaki!
My wife has never appeared though on it, so please get her on at one point, we are huge fans, Sanpei here!
Sanyutei Enraku
For a long time, people have said I am a wicked man
But I am nothing compared to you, Hama-chan.
We are aware of your doings
Secretly buying ivory
Underground casinos
Production of counterfeit bills
Visits to the Kinshicho Hotel
That's you!!
That's you!
Sorry about this year
Hayashiya Taihei
As this is the "No laughing" edition of oogiri
I, Taihei, would like to wrap this up with a little riddle
Whether it be New Year's Eve
Or he spends too much time recording on set
At the heart lies
His worries for his rear-end
I see!
You're referencing the punishment!
Please bring him out
Yes
Understood!
Alright everyone, altogether now
Tanakaaaaaaaaa
THAI KICK!
This ends our program
Tanaka
That was pretty exquisite
After all that
I thought that was the end
It did say in the video
Tanaka let's go
But Tanaka actually be careful
I can't believe this exists
Wait wait wait
I thought it ended with Hosei-san
It didn't end!
There's no ending!
Is this serious?
You gotta be careful, Tanaka
Watch out
Doing this every year
Is this actually happening!?
OW!! aaahhh
Watch out
OW!! aaahhh
Watch out
This is it
Yep
Oh, and this
The suspicious part, his hell
What was that "watch out" about?
What made him say "watch out" from that?
Maybe the corner
He was about to hit his head
You just went "watch out"
Sorry
Even in that situation you say that?
Yeah I'm surprised even in that state
"Ouch" comes first like usual...
Maybe see something else
Is that normal?
Maybe it's not that painful at all?
No, really, that's really weird
That's definitely weird
Tanaka, now that I think about it, that's strange
It probably wasn't that painful
When I got itI couldn't see anything around me at all
When I got it I couldn't see anything around me at all
Right?
Because the kick was so hard
Yeah of course
Wouldn't that be the situation for you?
It was incredibly painful
It's a Thai Kick, after all
It was very painful
But then you drifted that way
The force of the kick
moved me this way
And into this corner
The corner right?
Right here
Onto where?
The head
Which is why I wentI went "watch out"
Which is why I went "watch out"
to myself
We get that!
You're not answering the question!
You were fine then!
No, there's no way
Then explain!
It's not like that
Explain!
Everyone's familiar withthe Thai kick's pain right?
Everyone's familiar with the Thai kick's pain right?
Well of course
Yeah
So everyone's familiar with that
There are ones that hit hard and not as much
Like every year,
"Look at poor Tanakagot hit bad again"
"Look at poor Tanaka got hit bad again"
I was worried for him but then...
he said "watch out" so casually
This one was a hit
I thought "He's pretending it hurt"...
Wait wait, I would never do that!
If you haven't said itthen we wouldn't be talking about it
If you haven't said it then we wouldn't be talking about it
So that means if you got hit with a real kick Black Right
Left and you're at the peak of your pain Right
Then at the same time put something delicious in your mouth
you'd say "delicious" instead?
I probably would
Let's get another kick in with those snacks over there
Wait hold on a second
Why?
The last one was pretty suspicious
Right
Wait, no
It seemed as if it didn't hurt at all
That's not right
I agree
Not right
Because
That man is an expert
Sausage, great
Tanaka, you like sausages right?
It's not arabiki or anything
Chiikama? (A cheese fishcake snack in the form of a sausage)
It is chiikama
This is good
Now wait a second
Put it in your mouth
I think this would count as science if anything
"Will the brain still react to delicious food despite
a painful experience happening?" would be the name of the question
This is profound
The "watch out" being said so smoothly was just suspicious
The "watch out" being said so smoothly was just suspicous
Alright!
Good luck
I just think that's suspicious
I wonder how it'll turn out
Alright
Eat it, quick
While you're in pain
Eat it. Eat it quickly.
How is it?
That one looked especially painful right?
"Don!"
He didn't drop it
It struck his core
It's the type of kick where you're insides would blow out
It was that kind of kick
Just all out
Of course that would happen
This experiment proved that the first one probably wasn't painful
It hurts so much...
Are you unsure?
If you're unsure
We can do it again
Where's the chiikama?
You didn't eat the chiikama at all
Well? Give us an answer already
You're not saying anything
Did you eat it or not?
Wait a moment, what is this?
Were you able to say it or no?
I was't able to
Why not?
Because it was painful
So that means the first time wasn't painful then
Hm?
They were both painful
Are you sure about that?
If only you said "that was the second time" instead that would've been smoother
We would've completely been convinced
We would be convinced
Maybe just hold it in your mouth?
Hold it
So I'll just hold it...
But you've been touching it this whole time
It's fine
I wouldn't want that either
Can we please switchchiikamas?
Can we please switch chiikamas?
That'd just be wasteful
I've been watching you hold that thing like crazy
Anyways, let's start in the position of you holding it in your mouth
With this thing?
It's for science
I really don't wanna do this
It's an experiment
If you said "The first hit didn't hurt" earlier
No that's untrue
Not true at all
Maybe if you said "Both were the same"
That would be a bit more understandable
But you guys understand this right?
So he should just hold it in his mouth?
I really don't wanna put that in my mouth
It's been nonstop with Hosei-sanand that thing
It's been nonstop with Hosei-san and that thing
Here it comes
I'm so done with this
Why?
Why is this happening?
Alright
Why is this happening?!
You have to eat it quick
Endo?
How's the taste?
How was the taste?
Did you eat it?
Why don't you eat it already?
Maybe if he eats it now...
Now's the time
Pleas...Mh..
How is it?
UAAGH
It's probably gross by now
Were you able to tell the taste?
How is it?
Good?
Why don't you tell us anything!?
He was eating it this time, at least
You're not telling us anything
So...
Did you like it?
You didn't eat the *chiikama* at all
Right
I couldn't say anything
Why?
It... It was too painful
It... It was too painful too painful
It...It was too painful
Then that means that initial reaction was suspicious
No no
You're still gonna deny this?
It's wasteful right?
What're you doing with this?
Are you crying?
I am
He's crying?
Yes he is
I saw the tears
You can't cry!
Oh, man
It was painful
It's 11:30 in the morning
Research Facility Working Time 3 Hours 30 Minutes
The group finally goes to work after their arrival
Alright everyone
We'll now join your fellow scientists
to get to know your peers better through a recreational event
Make sure to change and get ready
Alright
A social event?
A team exercise to bond with fellow
Scientists through Recreation!
A team exercise with other scientists
With a certain purpose
to the differently colored costumes
Let's get going
"Let's get going," you say
I can't say I'm too excited
Auditorium
This way
Yeah Yeah
Alright everyone
From here on, during recreation time, it's okay to laugh
During recreation time, Laughing is OK!!
Special Rule
Are you sure?
When the music starts playing, pull the double doors to open it
Right
What's this all about?
Alright Alright
Why the color split?
Team Miyasako vs Team Fujimon
Ebisu Yoshikazu
Tomonori Jinnai
Hakata Daikichi
Endo Shozo
Tsukitei Hosei
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Fujimoto Toshifumi
Captain
Miyasako Hiroyuki
Captain
RyuChel
Ayabe Yuji
Azuma Mikihisa
Cunning Takeyama
Tanaka Naoki
Hamada Masatoshi
Physical fitness wise, they totally have an advantage, I mean...
we don’t really need this guy (Ebisu) do we?
He’s our senior
The skill balance between you guys are equal though
He’s already losing hair as well!
You've got a few people there
You’ve got Ochiken here as well
T/N: Housei is a part of the Rakugo society, which is like story telling in the entertainment business. Junior is calling Hosei sort of something like an amateur storyteller.
Ochiken, my ass!
You love it, don’t you!?
Why do you keep saying "Ochiken, Ochiken" over and over?
He’s losing hair as well!!
He is losing hair
Please don’t compare me to him
To each their own
That’s irrelevant anyway
Okay let’s start the game...
First battle is
Assistant
(Nippon TV Announcer)
Tokushima Erika
Chihara Junior
Extreme Praising Praise Praise Battle!
Extreme Praising
Praise Praise Battle!
We won't lose!
To be a top scientist
Various observations are necessary
Everyone’s skill in daily observation will be tested in today’s game
So now this is for everyone, you will be notified of the target
Extremely Praise the target! Praise Praise battle!!
Staying in rhythm, you will have to praise the target
If you are unable to praise or cannot stay in rhythm, you are OUT
Praise, Praise Target
You have to fully praise the target
Clapping in rhythm, you will have to praise in order. If you are unable to praise or cannot stay in rhythm, you are OUT!
He’s funny
Cares for juniors
He’s rich
This will be judged by Junior-san.
He’s smart
The team with the most praises will receive 10 points
Extremely Praise the target! Praise Praise battle!!
The team with the most praises gets 10 points!!
Everyone, remember to follow the rhythm when you’re praising
Don’t be too embarrassed in praising the person
Just give us your true thoughts on the person’s positives
Just mention the good traits; that's it
This is a good chance to speak our minds
That is correct
First
Miyasako
Miyasako Hiroyuki
Ayabe Yuuji
Cunning Takeyama
Hamada Masatoshi
Tanaka Naoki
First round, the first team up will be Team Miyasako
This team of 5 will be thrown into battle
Let’s start off with Miyasako
The topic will be Tanaka Naoki
Tanaka Naoki
Praise Target
Okay let’s get this thing rolling. Start!
He’s kind
He has good taste
He’s a good actor
He’s tall
I love animals
He’s a devoted husband
He’s kind to his juniors
He will give you anything
What? He will give you anything?
What? He will give you anything
What did you get?
You gave me heaps of things, didn’t you?
What kind of things?
What's up with that voice?
What kind of things did you get?
What kind of things?
Things like snacks like when we were working together
Your voice is so friggin croaky!
What the hell is wrong with your voice?
What kind of voice is that? It's so croaky man!
What are you talking about? I can’t hear you!
Does it matter that my voice is like this?
Man, isn’t your hair falling out as well?
Yes that is also true
Is that a problem?
Like have you ever given him anything?
Yeah, there were a bunch of sweets and it looked like he wanted some
He was hesitant, so I offered some to him
Were they your sweets?
It was Tanaka’s 'Cuz it was on his TV drama show
He was the top guy!
Okay then!
It did happen!
He will give you anything!
He will give anything
He has a good physique
NOPE
He's tall
Doesn't he have a good physique?
He does have a good physique!
Yeah he does have a good physique!
His chin is well shaped
Bad feature!
That's a bad feature, dude
His jawline is sharp
If the person himself doesn’t agree, then you are OUT; what did you think?
I think it is an attractive feature of mine
Seriously?
What the hell?
Are you kidding?
Now you say it's attractive
What the hell, man?
He has a good physique
I’m not fussy
He loves kids
He cares for his wife
Huh? He said devoted husband!
That won't do
You can't do that
It’s the same thing as devoted husband, so OUT!
Yeah, boring, boring...
Miyasako
11 rounds
They don’t have that many points either
Wasn’t that exciting...
Not even the production staff laughed.
We are hilarious!!
Let’s see them give it a shot
You know what, the questions were shit
and I ain’t that interested in Tanaka anyway
Second
Fujimon
Fujimoto Toshifumi
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Tsukitei Housei
Tomonori Jinnai
Hakata Daikichi
Next up is Team Fujimon
Can they break Team Miyasako’s 11-round record?
This is taking forever, do we still have time?
Aren’t our members hiliarious?
Come on guys, line up please!
Alrighty then
That’s totally not funny!
Just do it
T/N: Fujimon is referencing a popular Japanese tutoring commercial with the tagline "Ima desho" (今でしょ).
Just do it
Everyone
You killed it!
That was hiliarious!
That’s the punchline, isn’t it?
They're laughing
It was freakin' hilarious
We’re starting with Fujimon!
Team Fujimon’s praising target is Fujimoto Toshifumi!
Praise Target
Fujimoto Toshifumi
I’m a devoted husband
He’s got a cute beard
On the second round?
On the second round??
What?
It's just the second round
It is cute, isn't it?
Your second praise is “He’s got a cute beard”
Hold up, hold up
It IS cute
To prove that you mean it, you gotta kiss him
Kiss him if you think it’s cute!
You gotta kiss him
It's cute, right?
This is getting intense
If you don't, you're out
If you think so, then please kiss him
I think Fujimon is a bit of a fairy, so no thanks
I want to!
Hurry up!!
Alrighty then!!
His lips are bloody soft as
So soft!!
My lips are like tingling right now
It was the beard
Okay you proved it
That was just the second round
Okay second round was
He has a cute beard
He has a nice hairstyle
Always cheerful
He has a good dress sense
I’m not shy
He has a lot of shoes
He does have a lot of shoes
Are you that bad?
You just suck
He DOES have a lot of shoes
If you really think so, please kiss him
Alright OKAY!!
Come on guys
He has a lot of shoes
He's a loving son
His reactions are funny
He’s a hard worker
I love kids
He takes long baths
Come on, man!
Come on, man, what was that?
He totally sucks!
You couldn’t even get one right!
If you didn’t get those kisses, you would’ve lost twice already!
First
Miyasako
Miyasako Hiroyuki
Azuma Mikihisa
Cunning Takeyama
Hamada Masatoshi
Tanaka Naoki
Praise Battle: second round
With these 5 members, Team Miyasako will fight back
Okay let's get started
The topic is Hamada Masatoshi
Praise Target
Hamada Masatoshi
Praise timer start!
He’s a very good comedian
He’s very kind
He’s very cheerful
I have a good physique
I didn't know that
No way!!
Nope!
Do you really have a good physique?
Why the hell are you all ganging up on me!?
Which part is good?
It’s not always about the looks, isn’t it?
It’s about posture, right?
He’s short and stout!
He’s the shortest and stoutest!
Let’s go with something else
They did the same thing too anyway!
Like them we’ll just do it again
Come on, Downtown...
He’s very kind
I’m very handsome
Aw come onnnn
No wayyy
I can’t compliment myself?
Hamada-san, you’re not that handsome
You’re pretty ugly!
I can say that about myself, can't I?
Ebisu, why don't you tell him?
You’re not that handsome!
Why is that?
Those were some harsh words!
Frankly speaking, you're just okay looking
He's not even "okay"
Okay, let’s get to it!
You’re too lenient, Junior!
No way he's handsome...
I’m very handsome
He’s good at golf
He’s dignified
He’s a strong drinker
He’s a good actor
I'm a devoted husband
That's an OUT
OUT!
That was the worst OUT this year
Can't I compliment myself!?
Worst OUT this year
Worst OUT
Worst OUT this year
The general consensus is you're OUT
Couldn't back you up on that one
If I didn’t say it, then who would?!
I knew you guys wouldn’t say that about me!
Second
Fujimon
Fujimoto Toshifumi
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Tsukitei Housei
Hakata Daikichi
Ebisu Yoshikazu
Next up is Team Fujimon
Can they break Team Miyasako’s record 8 rounds?
The topic is Ebisu Yoshikazu
Praise target
Ebisu Yoshikazu
He writes interesting manga
He often takes the bus
Wrong
That was shit!!
That was quick...
It was just so sudden
That totally sucked
Too sudden
After the claps, you get no time whatsoever!
I don't like it
That's for everyone
That's how it is!!
Taking the bus is fine, isn’t it?
Taking the bus
He often takes the bus for work, right?
That's right, for work!
Okay we accept "He often takes the bus"
Keeping up the rhythm
He often takes the bus
He’s into boat racing
He’s kind to others
You're just clapping
He can't even do it
No good.
That's an OUT
You couldn't even follow the rhythm, so please stop
You must have something good to praise yourself with
It was over when Nakai came.
"Ye-s" Nakai in the house.
Yep, good job. Let's start from your part.
Let's go.
No matter what curry he eats-
Too early.
Early.
OUT! It's OUT!
Let's go!
No matter what curry-
Make it match!
After the thump thump.
If you can't even do it now, you will fail with anyone.
No matter who the theme is about, you will fail.
He can't even get the rhythm.
Lets go
Curry is delicious anywhere.
You are just praising curry.
Team Miyasako is in lead.
An unexpected turnout with Downtown after this.
If you win, you are OUT Rock-Paper-Scissors.
The loser continues.
If you win, you are OUT! If you lose, you continue!!
To become a top-notch scientist,
reacting fast is essential.
Sounds hard. Sure does.
Let's test your reaction time
with a game challenge.
The rules are simple.
Play Rock-Paper-Scissors to this rhythm.
You win by losing more times than your opponent.
First are the captains Miyasako vs. Fujimoto.
Miyasako has to continue losing first.
Okay, Miyasako, are you up for it?
My reflexes are so amazing.
Do your best.
I see.
So I will win easily.
How do you respond, Fujimon?
My head is also fast so
I won't lose.
Do your best
Let's get it on, Miyasako
Rock-Paper-Scissors
where the loser continues
START
Wait!
No, no, no, no.
He sucks.
That's too early in the round.
I want to puke.
Did you see that? His arms went crazy,
and then suddenly his fingers went limp.
Scary
When your part comes up,
I will roast all of you!!
It's so freaking difficult.
Now Fujimon will be
the one who has to lose.
Next person to lose Fujimoto Toshifumi
I just have to keep losing, right?
Take it away.
I can easily do this.
Easy stuff.
Start!
You are on fire.
The winner is
Fujimon.
That's our leader.
De-ci-si-ve win
Decisive win!!
If you do it wrong I will tear you apart!!
Decisive win for us!!
Second battle: Cunning Takeyama VS. Hakata Daikichi.
Takeyama has to lose.
So
Just look at him
He's just digusting The one in blue is disgusting.
I will definitely win.
I am confident.
Even his voice is dirty.
My voice has nothing to do with it.
I only have to do Rock-Paper-Scissors.
Part of that dodgy agency!
No, we are not!!
We're not dodgy in the slightest!
Part of that dodgy agency!!
No, we are not!!
How are you feeling?
As if I'm going to lose to someone who loses his voice on such a big job.
Let's get ready.
Continue-if-you-lose START
Put it out faster.
Wait a minute
The distance it's...
The distance
I want you much closer for the camera.
Even more. Stick it out!
Closer.
Get closer.
All or nothing.
Rock-Paper-Scissors START
You are famous for comedic outbursts, right?
Why did you slip up?
Couldn't do it.
Let's rotate.
Daokichi, your turn.
Loser-continues START
Enough already!
Hakata Daikichi
Decisive winner.
It's a decisive winner.
This person is a decisive winner.
World champion.
This was the world championship.
Just relax and then you can do it.
Last one: Downtown battle.
Last Battle: 53 year old middle-aged Downtown's throwdown.
Starting with Matsumoto.
Hey wait, it's shameful for me to do it with this guy.
Bring me someone with youthful energy.
It's a battle between two who suck equally.
That's low!!
Let's continue with Rock-Paper-Scissors.
START!
Weak!!
It's okay. Weren't ready.
You weren't ready, right?
Junior is too fast.
Stop making it about preparation, please.
This is a match.
Simply put out your hand.
Wait everyone, let's take a picture.
I refuse.
One more time.
I just didn't get it last time.
It's the freaking first time I've ever done this!!
It's the freaking first time for me, you idiots!!
That's true for all of us.
You should only be angry at the blue team!
START!
This is terrible.
What the hell is this!!
You're the leader!!
No, it's just that...
Aren't you the leader?
It's just that I really wanted to win.
You so confidently stuck out a paper
When your partner put out rock.
Because I've never done this!!
Winning by putting it out later. What the hell...
Let's reverse the roles next time.
Okay so...
Ah, okay.
Next person who has to lose: Hamada Masatoshi
I just have to lose, right?
Hamada
Lose-to-win Rock-Paper-Scissors
The loser continues
START!
Rock-Paper-Scissors-Lose!
His timing is completely off!
It's just Downtown!!
They're the worst!!
Just trash!!
They just played it like normal.
This is messed up.
Damn it!
Alright, one more time!
This is really hard though
Please keep your cool!
I don't really get it
They're pretty bad
Ready - start!
Rock-Paper-Scissors-Lose!
I told you!!
What the hell are you doing, Hamada?!
I WON
Yes it's my win!
One loser and
One loser and another loser!
I won, didn't I?
My turn went really good, didn't it?
You were just as bad!!
Both of you - OUT!!
Matsumoto did it right several times though
No he didn't.
An idiot with another idiot!
And with that,
the recreational scientist team battle ends with both teams losing
Slowly getting colder out here.
We're a bit sweaty too.
~Jan~Ken~Pon~Pon
Daikichi was pretty amazing
It's all about if you can get the hang of the game...
Whoa- It's a kid!
Both of them in Adidas tracksuits...
I'm taking him to the hospital!
He's got a MAJOR FEVER!!
Taking the boy for check-ups
He's so annoying.
How are you feeling?
I've got the chills...
Looks like he just came back from the store
Squeak~
Make the kid change his voice a bit...
Exactly.
"I've got the chills"...
He's pretty obsessed with fevers, isn't he?
12:30 PM
Despite returning to the lab, they keep thinking about that rhythm...
Rock-Paper-Scissors, lose!
Hey, Hamada?
When he said Rock-paper-scissors lose,
You kinda smiled a little there!!
No I didn't!
Alright, ring him out in 3 - 2 - 1
Go! Ba-baaaan.
Yeah, this is a no-laughing game, so.
I did NOT laugh! What's up with you guys?
Those are the rules after all.
We're getting better at hiding it though.
Sometimes they can't tell if we laughed or not
How about you two try it?
Give it a shot. That game.
Let's do it, Tanaka?
Tanaka has to lose to Hosei after he's thrown.
Endo, say "Rock-Paper-Scissors lose!" then?
One, two- Rock-paper-Scissors, lose!
That was amazing.
Now, switch sides?
What? You just won!!
He doesn't even know when he loses...
Still, we did it four times straight.
You wanna try it too?
Okay, so, you have to lose to-
Dude, I know.
Rock-Paper-Scissors, Go!
I HATE THIS, IT KEEPS MAKING ME LAUGH!
This game isn't fun at all!
Wait, me too?
You laughed big time.
This game is dangerous.
They hit pretty hard now, right?
How about we play normally, but you have to win the throw?
Basically win after I've already seen your hand?
Yeah, just win?
I wouldn't lose in a thousand years!!
Right, come over here.
He just has to throw the winning hand.
Okay, Matsumoto and Hosei are playing.
Rock-Paper-Scissors-Win!
Huh?
So I just- the fingers-
Seriously, what.
My ability to focus just disappeared.
I guess the timing is hard to get used to?
Could we do it by saying the outcome?
Saying the outcome?
For example.
Throw after me, right?
Win!
Ah I get it!
Lose!
Win!
Way too slow!!
Could you try it the other way around?
Let me just concentrate like hell, okay?
Win!
Lose!
You're too slow!
Win!
You take so long!!
You're just so slow!
Damn slow!
He's like a really old man.
It's just not a natural movement?
Give it a shot then, if you're so great.
Yeah, let's do it.
It just can't be that hard!
Hamada accepts the challenge.
You were legendarily slow though!
There's no way you can lose!
Takes a while to get used to the moves, right?
Win!
Lose!
Ah~
This guy is awful.
He went Aah~.
I didn't think you'd say "Lose!"
Getting it right instantly is pretty hard, eh?
Yeah!
Seems pretty hard, still funny though.
But the worst thing by far
"Aahn~"
Saying "Aah~" like he did.
Ah-ahn~
Should stop here.
I expected-
I expected you to say "Win!" and got messed up!
The game got way too complicated there.
I can't get over the Ahn~
That Ah~
Is seriously unbearable
Even if a foreigner heard that!
Oh! This guy messed up real bad
Just by how he said Ahn~.
This dude is hopeless
"This dude is hopeless"
These guys hit hard too...
Let's try playing "Look away!"
So like, "Look away-way-way".
Getting it right three times would be pretty amazing.
Coming up with a new game on the spot
Three times?
Alright, Look away-way-way!
Couldn't see his finger at all
What the hell even happened just now?
You got it twice though!
Yeah, not bad!
Pretty hard game, isn't it.
How about Look away-away?
Turning your head like that is already hard.
Yeah, true.
I'll go "one-two, hoi hoi!"
One-two-
Hoi-hoi!
Nice!
Try doing that three times straight.
Hoi-hoi, hoi-hoi, hoi-hoi.
Hoi-hoi!
Probably can't even see his finger.
You need a sixth sense for this.
Right?
This was the worst so far!
You gotta go with your instincts.
If you did it 8 times,
and got it wrong every time, now that would be amazing.
More of a miracle I think.
Increasing the difficulty by going eight times.
So like, hoihoihoihoihoihoihoihoi
You've gotta miss all of them okay?
Ready, set-
Hoi-hoi-hoi-hoi-hoi-hoi-hoi-hoi-hoi
Obviously we're going to...
Did anyone even keep score?
No one even bothered with score!!
They've been working for 5 hours straight
1 PM
Hamada is still trying to deal with Tanaka's baby-faced weapon.
Could you put that thing on? And then the thai kick?
Eh-wait, what do you mean?
"Put that on and then the kick" What do you mean by that?
Well, without it you can see the kick and prepare for it. Put it on and you won't see it coming.
How y'all doing?
Here at our famous Gaa-Suu laboratories,
we focus on
passing down the secrets of training your body }strengthening team spirit
passing down the secrets of training your body strengthening team spirit
Let's go and do some special training.
Prepare yourselves.
Training the body and mind: The scientists' secret training begins