what do you call people in their forties?
(Write the answer on the front of the board)
Timing/Typesetting: Hinnerk Kazuma Inugami Sacro AIDOL Keicchi Kevin Rich
Translation: Michael Half-San Lei Oolong typesoshee
Final checker: James EroGG
Team Leader: Alex (Slayeer)
TG
People in their thirties are called arasa* but
*Translator's note: Arasa is short for "around thirty"
Secret prank in
TEAM Gaki presents:
I wrote it
Hard Gay Razor Ramon congratulates their correct answer
Foo! The answer is...
ARA-FOO~~~!!!
My shoulder is messed up
Congratulations!!
For you two who got it right,
I shall award you the first "Prison Escape Medal"
1st Prison Escape Medal Attained!
Congratulations!
It's that big?
Please continue this way
Tanaka is in confinement
Okay, we get it, so...
Really though
I messed up my shoulder
His shoulder seems to be messed up!!
Looks like he's got old stiff shoulders!!
Sign
Rescue Tanaka, who is
confined in this room.
Vocal confirmation is needed before entering
Rescue Tanaka, who is confined in this room.
Vocal confirmation is needed before entering
I don't want to do this kind of thing...
Is it here?
Yeah
There it is!!
Ah, I see
Tanaka is confined in the back room
How do we do the vocal confirmation?
Are we supposed to sit here?
The hell? My hands are tied, I'm holding a medal, I'm scared...
Vocal Confirmation System
Announcer
The vocal confirmation will now commence
Yes, vocal...
Face the microphone and say your own name
I am Matsumoto Hitoshi
Announcer
Vocal Confirmation
System
Vocal confirmation in progress...
Vocal confirmation is complete
Phew...
You are Matsumoto Hitoshi, correct?
Yes!
Vocal confirmation done
Vocal confirmation is a success
Announcer
Next person, please take a seat
Thank God
Face the microphone and say your own name
Announcer
I am Hamada Masatoshi
Announcer
Vocal confirmation in progress...
Vocal Confirmation
System
Vocal confirmation is complete
You are Sato Gajiro, correct?
They sure love using Sato as a joke...
His voice matches with Gajiro's
Maybe it's broken
We already did this
No, not correct
Did the voices match up?
Announcer
Vocal confimation has failed
We will start over from the beginning
You failed!!
We've done this before
Face the microphone
and say your own name
Please, just work
I am Hamada Masatoshi
Failed confirmation causes carbon dioxide gas spray
Announcer
We have confirmed you as Sato Gajiro
The door will now unlock
That's all it took?
Don't just let it be
Tanaka's Confinement Room
Pardon me
My shoulder is messed up
Seems he's got the old stiff shoulders
Why are you by yourself?
I don't know! I was just brought here...
And I can't move
Sign
One of these boxes
contains the key
to release Tanaka
One of these boxes contains the key to release Tanaka
What should we do? There's one over there too.
The first box's contents are...
I'm counting on you
Can I just do this one?
But your shoulder isn't doing well...
There's nothing in here
The first box was empty
Go open that one
I'm really counting on you, please
I just opened it normally
And there was nothing in there
Oh, there it is
Zap
Bam!
Electrocuting key and collapsing chair
I really hate this
I didn't want to do this, I told you!
What the hell are YOU doing?
Tanaka, why are you rolling around?
The order of this, is it simultaneous?
What the hell, it was successful?!
The chair, the chair...
Seriously though, that really hurt
My body can't take this abuse!!
Whoa, scary!
The masked jailer releases Tanaka
There it is
We got the second piece
Huh what?
2nd Prison Escape Medal Attained
See, we have one too
We need 5 total
We have to collect all 5
Going to release Hosei & Endo, but...
After attaining 2 pieces of the medal, the three guys
try to leave the room, but...
Why won't it open?
You're right
The door won't open...
What? What's going on?
You're joking right?
What the hell!
The wall closes in on the 3 guys
The door!
Open it, open it, open it!!
It won't open!
It stops right before it flattens them
What the hell?
Scary!
It opened!
It opened
It opened, it opened
The door unlocks
Maybe you were pushing it the wrong way
Me?
What was up with that guy just then?
Hatake
Garitto-Chuu Fukushima
What was that about?
That was kind of scary
Ominous Locker
I really don't like this...
Tanaka, seriously, don't get startled
His shoulder is messed up
Because of this, I...
PARADISE!!
Seriously, I'll kick your ass
I'll kick your ass, really
From the locker, it's Nakagawa Paradise
Why is he here?
I don't get what's happening.
Please stop
Go somewhere else!!
Push push!
Shut up
Never say "Paradise" again!!
Yeah
Paradise!!
SHUT UP!!
Prison 2nd Floor
If these shackles weren't on me,
my shoulder wouldn't be like this
True
Arrived at Hosei's & Endo's confinement room
Oy! Over here!
It says for Tanaka to sit on the chair and wait
Sign
Release Hosei & Endo!
Tanaka, sit on the chair
and wait!!
Really? This chair also seems scary...
Help us! Help us!
The 2 are together.
Tanaka, just wait right there!!
I'm just supposed to wait here?
What happened?
Please help us
We're confined here
Release
depends on
this game challenge!!
At this time, Downtown
The release of the 2
must complete the mission,
for Hosei and Endo's release depends on it
Release Mission
Inside the room are 4 plastic bottles
The 2 must transport the bottles 1 by 1 between their faces to the trash
The 2 of them must transport the bottles 1 by 1 by putting the bottle between their faces all the way to the trash
The 2 must transport the bottles 1 by 1 between their faces to the trash
If in 30 seconds all the bottles are transported, mission complete
If all 4 bottles are transported in 30 seconds, the mission is complete
The bottles get smaller and smaller, but we're counting on you!
30 seconds okay?
We're counting on you!
Okay, nicely done, nice!
Thank you!
3 more to go!
3 more!
They're getting smaller, but please!
Please do your best!
Thank you!
Sec
Remaining
Time limit
Thank you!
Just a little more!
1 more to go!
Thank you!
MISSION SUCCESS
We did it
It was a success!
Why does this have to happen?
The chair collapses for some reason
Why?
It was a success
Thank you very much!!
Someone's coming
They're gonna open it
since the mission was a success!!
Thank you very much!
Hosei & Endo are released
3rd and 4th Prison Escape Medals Attained!!
Hosei and Endo are released safely
Downtown's shackles are also taken off
They get 2 more medals
Only 1 more medal! The 5 rush to for their Prison Escape!
There is only 1 more medal left
The 5 rush on to their Prison Escape
Secret Prank
Nooo...
"Prison Escape Medal"??
Yeah
It's supposed to be prison escape training, but
why do we gotta...
What the hell is that!?
Tokyo Skytree official mascot
Introducing Sorakara-chan on a Segway
You're kidding me!!
No way, no no no
What is that?
It's what's-her-face-chan
It's the Skytree girl
Sorakara-chan!!
Why are all of your shoulders in pain?
There's something here
Gaasuu's mouth
Put your hand in Gaasuu's mouth!
Only those with a pure heart
will get a Prison Escape Medal!
A medal for the pure-hearted...
Gaasuu's Mouth
Says you can get a medal
Only those with a pure heart
Matsumoto goes for Gaasuu's mouth
Please!!
Something touched me!!
Maybe they're trying to give you a medal?
Maybe they'll give it to you
Don't you dare lick or bite me, you hear?!
Don't do it!!
Lick
I got licked!!
That's gross
So gross! I just got licked!!
Ijiri Okada
Naked
It was definitely some old dude!
I was definitely licked, just licked! Smells bad!!
It's definitely some old guy
Probably is some old guy
Just some behind-the-scenes old guy for sure!!
No one likes being licked by some behind-the-scenes old guy!!
There's supposed to be a medal there?!
Excuse me, but really, just give me the medal
Hamada goes for Gaasuu's mouth
There's no end to this
Lick
You licked me!!
Try and smell it
Smells awful!!
Smells bad bad bad!
Give us the damn medal, you moron
5th Prison Escape Medal Attained!!
Why didn't you just give it to me right then?
Was it a naked old man?
A naked old man?
Prison 1st Floor
That's so gross...
A behind-the-scenes old man!!
A behind-the-scenes naked old guy...
What is that?
Come on...
A mountain of stuffed animals
Really now...
There's not much movement in there
You're right
A bunch of stuffed animals...
Let's go!!
That's our only choice
I'm scared, I'm scared, I'm scared
Shake
Inside the stuffed animals is Chucky
The attack of the Chucky army
So scary
Please stop!!
What's happening?
Masked jailers group, once again
Alright alright, geez
Wait wait wait, what? Okay...
Hold on!!
Someone's there
Introducing an ally of justice?
This is a relief
I feel relieved
Oh good
Yeah, we get it now
It's so cold, must be quite hard for you
So true
You must've been waiting a while
Who do you think I am?
Translator's note: Tamu-Ken is short for Tamura Kenji, a comedian
You're Tamu-Ken!!*
You're Tamuken.*
*Note: Tamuken refers to comedian Tamura Kenji.
No!
It's me.
An Ally of Justice?
Tamura Kenji
An Ally of Justice?
Tamura Kenji
It's Tamuken.
He was right.
What the hell are you doing?
Ask yourself that!!
I’ll help you!!
You’re going to help us?
Really?
Lion dance
The last one is Asada Mai!!*
*Note: Asada Mai is a figure skater.
Bam!
The last move wasn’t Asada Mai though. It was the lion dance.
To be precise, yeah.
Isn't this really funny?
This?
It is curious.
Do you remember? It was all the rage.
Come on, 2007.
I really don’t know.
When Yamamoto Mona*
*Note: Yamamoto Mona is a tarento who in 2006 was caught having an affair with married politician Hosono Goshi. After spending some time away from the public eye, she returned to TV in 2007.
emerged from exile
and hosted Owarai Ultra Quiz, she wore this.
Yamamoto Mona
She wore this. Wasn’t that really funny?
You’re right, now that you remind us.
Since then, she hasn’t used this, so I took it!!
From her, directly?
Well, I didn’t confirm it with her directly.
Are you going to escape?
Yes, yes we want to.
That's why we're here.
Well, yeah, that's what this is.
I’ll take you!!
Let's go.
With Tamuken’s guidance, they head to the escape point
His role is this important?
Then let's go.
Just leave the horse?
The horse is fine. I’ve told-ah them about it!!
Told-ah?
Telephone Booth
Hey, something’s written there.
One person shall
enter the telephone booth
and wait for instructions!!
One person shall enter the telephone booth
and wait for instructions.
Discussion over who enters
Well…
What?
Who’s good at this?
There's no good or bad at this.
The person who would fit just right in there
would be you, Tamura.
Why don’t you go?
Oh, yeah.
Yes.
Me? No. You're the prison escapees. You're the ones who have to do this.
But as long as one person…
No, I don’t think there’s any rule like that.
Do you want me to hold the lion dance mask?
I got it.
Yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
After discussion, Tamuken to go inside
Get the instructions.
Really? I can do it?
Shouldn’t you take the watermelon off?
Yeah, you should take it off.
Really?
Yeah, there you go.
So you prepared your head just in case.
You styled your hair!!
He’s serious.
I can really do it? Ow!!
Jagged gravel
Well, yeah, that would happen.
The phone will probably ring, if it’s the same set up as always.
Give the instructions.
Okay.
This turned out well.
Yeah, it really did.
There it is.
A call comes in to the public telephone
He’s shaking.
Pick it up.
Just from the ringing.
Yes?
Other speaker on the phone
Hello. Is this the owner of the barbecue restaurant that’s deep in the red?
It’s not in the red. It’s doing fine.
Other speaker on the phone
Your financial bubble has already burst!!
Countdown to a Secret Event
It hasn’t burst.
They hung up.
They hung up?
The door locks & in comes a massive amount of bubbles
Bubbles!
I see.
Oh, yeah.
What is this!? It’s gentle!
There’s nothing to this. I don't feel a thing!!
I think it’d be really uncomfortable.
Since the door has been locked, he cannot get out on his own
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You can’t get out.
There are more bubbles coming.
Door unlocked
Something's definitely strange.
Whoa.
Wow.
With all the bubbles...
there’s no oxygen anymore.
Right.
I thought I was gonna die.
When you thought it was about time to come out,
you couldn’t open the door and panicked!!
That’s a lot of soap bubbles.
I thought there was a malfunction.
It suddenly got scary, right? But for you, instead of us.
What the hell!?
A group of prisoners capture Tamuken
What are you doing? Help!
I wasn’t told about this!!
The plan was for me to keep going after this!!
Then, we’ll
just go in the direction of the arrows.
All we can do is just keep going.
I’ll leave this over here, then.
At one point, he was really seriously trying to get the door open!!
He was serious.
He tried to open it like a grown man!!
Yes, since it wouldn't open at all.
Prison field
Is there something here?
So, how does it make sense that
Yes?
we’re practising a prison escape?
That's true.
Again, it's this...
Right, this setup is scary.
Again with this scary setup.
It really is that scary setup.
The path leads to the escape point
You climb over the wall to escape a prison, right?
Yeah.
What is this?
The way they’re haphazardly placed is really scary.
I know, right?
There’s
something over there.
Oh, yes.
This is Tanaka’s job!!
Let’s go together!!
Tanaka, don’t push me.
There’s something where we can match those things together.
Oh, we fit in each one for everyone.
When the 5 medals are inserted, the prison escape is successful!
Insert the 5 prison escape medals.
Oh, I see.
Mine’s the bottom one.
There.
Right... Here.
Mine is probably also…
Mine is…
Here.
The last one.
Okay. It's in.
Wow.
Good job.
Did they find us!?
No, come on.
Announcement
This is an emergency.
5 prisoners have escaped.
Capture them at once!!
Capture them?
What is this!?
A horde of Pikachus & masked guards
It’s a crazy number of Pikachus!!
Seriously.
Why the hell is it Pikachu!?
He fell down again.
Tanaka, watch out!
Whoa!
It’s hot, it’s hot.
What a burden to the team.
Tanaka, are you all right?
He fell down again.
Sorry!
3 AM.
The men were forced to experience prison life…
For some reason this year,
the five men were forced to experience prison life.
After overcoming all the trials…
That moment has finally come...
Now, they approach that moment.
Here we go.
Everyone, be happy.
You are all to be released!!
Yes!
Now, each of you is a free man!!
Yes.
Good for you all.
Hamada.
Yes.
How was it?
We seriously gave it all we got...
but Toshi-chan (Tahara Toshihiko) really gave me trouble.
Matsumoto!!
I really say this every time, but there's a lot of misjudging and honestly, I think the others
should have been smacked more. There are always 10 or 20 times where
I don’t think I needed to be smacked.
Everyone should
pay attention to Hamada more
and make sure his are never missed!!
Those are my thoughts.
Let’s go then.
It’s cold out,
so everyone wear these.
Ah, my behind hurts.
Are we going to be told in the end why we were arrested?
Yes, we still don’t know in the end.
That’s true.
And who’s going to raise the child?
That’s right.
What’re you gonna do with Akio?
Akio will be looked after at the prison!!
At the prison?
I want to meet Akio when he’s grown up!!
Since we’re released, that means it’s 2015 now!!
Prison Entrance
The new year has arrived.
That’s right.
Can you, over here...
Can you line up over here?
Happy New Year!!
The Legendary Prison Director
Suga Kenji General Manager
The Legendary Prison Director
Suga Kenji General Manager
This year is the year of the sheep.
If I could have Master Tsukitei* lead the call.
*Note: Referring to Tsukitei Hosei recently gaining official credentials as a rakugo performer (traditional Japanese one-man verbal comedy).
A sya-ah-llable sentence composition with “Hitsuji Doshi (Year of the Sheep)”
I would like to conclude the year in this way.
Hitsuji Doshi (Year of the Sheep)
Syllable Sentence Composition* with
*Note: Syllable sentence composition (A-i-u-e-o Sakubun, or acrostic poem to us westerners) is a word game in which the syllables of a topic word are broken up and the composer composes a phrase that starts with each syllable. The phrases taken together should have an overarching theme that builds up to the final phrase, which is the most important line and acts as a punchline.
You messed up your line.
Master, if you will. Hitsuji Doshi.
And now,
Hitsuji doshi: Hi
Through the wide world
Tsu
Finally will fly
Ji
The 5 of them, with outstanding ability
Do
With more and more gigs
Shi
Shieeeh!!*
*Note: A gag made famous by the character Iyami in the manga Osamatsu-kun.
Thank you, and see you next year.
What the hell?
When he did the Shieeeh, his pivot leg was…
Is it that hard to stand like that?
He couldn’t maintain it at all.
We're finally done.
Number of times their butts were smacked
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Hamada Masatoshi
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Tsukitei Hōsei
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Endō Shōzō
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Tanaka Naoki
Yes, we’re done.
What, again?
Yes!
Ulfuls
Hooray ~I'm Glad I Fell in Love with You~*
Yay! I'm glad we did it again this year
*Note: The music is from "Hooray ~Thank Goodness I Fell in Love with You~" by Ulfuls, while the lyrics being sung have been changed to describe the episode’s events that happened. The performers seen here are Ulfuls.
Happy that butts could be smacked on and on
Crime – you didn’t commit one.
But on and on,
the five in prison.
It's Ulfuls.
Guitar: Ulful Keisuke
Ulfuls.
Bass: John B.
They look good.
Drums: Sankon Jr.
Vocals: Tortoise Matsumoto
On a pointless journey, give D (Matsuko Deluxe) trouble
The more I think about it, the more it hurts
The jokes of the duos who kept laughing
Were Anna and Rola's rip off skits
I don't want to see uncool macho men
Just like how that mask that wouldn't come off
I don't want to see Kida's butt
That ass, baby, stop showing your ass
Yay! I'm glad that I love you
Tetsuya will keep on, keep on, saying yes until death
Hooray! I'm glad that we met Toshi
Staying in that little room, little room
La la la, just the both of them
Kizana Kiyoshi starts singing
Tokuma dances enthusiastically
Always want to mess around with comrades
Mimata, baby! Bring your crotch over
Yay! I'm glad that you got to drink water
Ebisu's panty that he's worn for a long, long time
Dosukoi*! Your slap was so good
*Translator's Notes: "Dosukoi" is a sumo wrestler's exclamation/shout
Let's just stay, stay and expose secrets
Akio, baby! Baby!
Stay, stay, stay by my side
Yay! I'm glad he spreads his body
Until death, always, always, naked and happy
Hooray! Glad that we escaped from prison
Finally this year, this year
Yay! I'm glad it's the new year
From now on, let's keep, keep, smiling and be happy
Hooray! There weren't any serious injuries
Gaki will always, always, be the 5 of them
We wish you another year that overflows with laughter
So
That's the end, but we've already entered the new year
Happy New Year
The ending was performed by Ulfuls
Yeah, that was great
Yeah (didn't understand the last part)
It was good, wasn't it?
Next year maybe it could be a good idea to allow laughing instead
Then it will just be like any other day, wouldn't it?
Yeah, yeah, it would
It'll be just another ordinary day
At last
Perhaps, this year's chief of buzzwords will now be...
Endo Shozo
Sounds about right
After you say your piece, I'll say our farewell
Yes, understood
Everyone, please allow me
Please continue supporting us through the year of 2015
Please continue supporting Gaki no Tsukai this year as well
This story is a work of fiction. The names of groups and other things shown are fictitious